Oh my goodness! Can you believe this political season? I try to make a point of not sharing my political or religious views on any social platform. This one time, though, I can’t help but comment on the current commentary and this political race! My political views don’t mean much anyway, since I am not eligible to vote in the USA. In fact, since emigrating here from Canada in 1991, the only thing I’ve been allowed to vote for is the Teacher of the Year award. Since moving into School Psychology, I’ve been stripped of even that ballot. Oh well.
I like to try to stay up-to-date on current events and politics. I must say, though, that doing so becomes more and more difficult. It’s not because of a lack of information. There are several 24 hour news channels available to me. However, I find more and more that what I see and hear on those sources is little more than what I like to call bird-walking.
Let me illustrate: I am interviewing a teenaged student and ask, “So did you study for this test on which you did so poorly?”
The teen responds, “Well, you know that I have ADHD and my mom picked me up after school and we went to Taekwando and I was practicing there when I fell and broke my front tooth and sprained my ankle. So my Dad was out of town and he had the insurance card with him and I had to sit in the car while my Mom went to get 10 pounds of ice for my ankle and I couldn’t drink anything because it would sting my tooth. . . ” and so on and so on.
When the student pauses to take a breath, I usually say something like, “Well, I’m sorry to hear that. But what I asked you was, did you study for the test?”
What the student did was go on a bird walk. Distraction. Smoke and mirrors. Verbal slight of hand. Most kids eventually grow out of bird walking. Those that don’t become either professional Bird Dancers. Or political commentators. Or politicians.
So there are no straight answers. Listening to political talk on television feels like a giant bird walk. I try to follow the rantings, but so often it feels like responses to straight forward questions take me down a rabbit hole, through some wacky underground tunnel and dumps me somewhere out at sea. Perhaps this is because the topics are so complicated? Since no one seems to be able to solve the problems that are all the rage at the moment, maybe these powerful people could tackle some simpler, but vexing problems:
- Can someone (preferably me) be put in charge of making decisions about whether or not a classic piece of music can be covered? I’m not talking classiCAL here. Classic pop and rock. For example, whoever had the idea that Lenny Kravitz should record “American Woman” was out of their mind! The Guess Who OWN that song and ARE that song. I dread the day that some young whippersnapper thinks that they should record “Free Bird” or “Carry on Wayward Son.” I shudder to think.
- Can someone (preferably me) be put in charge of correcting spelling and grammar in fliers, signs and advertisements? Fingernails on a blackboard (you whippersnappers won’t understand) are less grating than the take-out menu that brags, “We Delivery.” I wanted to climb to the ceiling in a meeting room one day and correct the sign on the overhead projector that informed everyone that the projector wasn’t working “do to a water leak.” And I just wouldn’t be able to drop my children off here:
- Could someone (preferably not me) be put in charge of restricting merchants from premature seasonal displays? Three days ago my local grocery store had their entire seasonal aisle closed down. Why? Because they need to RUSH to get the Halloween merchandise on the shelves. Really? It’s not even September. There aren’t even ripe pumpkins yet, for Pete’s sake! Little kids will change their minds dozens of time about costumes between now and October 31, people!! I’d like to suggest a two week display, but as a gesture to the over-achievers, I could put up with three weeks of candy corn.
- Seriously. Could someone do something about this:I don’t think so. At the very least, I think this would be answered with a bird walk.